Get ready to meet the new Most Hated Owner in Sports. Former Cleveland Browns owner Art Modell, Arizona Cardinals owner Bill Bidwell and Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling can all breathe easier knowing that Malcolm Glazer is on top of the list now.  Glazer, who owns the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, assumed the position when he wrestled control of English soccer club Manchester United away from the fans who have loved it their entire lives.

If Glazer thought fans in Tampa Bay were antsy to return to winning, wait till he gets a taste of Manchester United’s crazies.  Glazer just completed a hostile takeover of the richest soccer team in the world, and it’s not going over very well across the pond.  Because United is a publicly-owned team (you can buy shares just like any other stock), Glazer was able to do so against the protests of legions of United supporters.

Glazer’s intentions have been known for a few years now, spurring the formation of a group called Shareholders United whose goal was to keep the rich American from owning their club.  The shareholders took a big blow last week, though, when Glazer increased his stake in the team with a buying spree, clearing the 75% hurdle to assume full ownership.  Glazer has made it clear that he intends to take the team off the stock market and turn it into a private club. 

Those poor saps in England.  To put things into perspective, United is like the Green Bay Packers of the UK.  They are the most storied and beloved franchise in any sport over there, and when fan ownership in the team comes into the equation, we’re talking about some serious investment, both emotionally and financially, in the club.  People who have lived and loved United football for their lives have just been raped, essentially, of their most direct connection to the club - ownership.  There would be some serious consternation in Green Bay if some Arab sheik with no football experience bought the Packers out from under those who had spent their lives building it.

Manchester is in full meltdown mode as we speak.  Supporters are being urged to wear black at this weekend’s FA Cup final, where United will face rival Arsenal.  Some fans groups are meeting this week to discuss forming a breakaway club.  Longtime season ticket holders are said to be giving up their tickets in protest.  And God forbid the backlash if Glazer interferes with club manager Sir Alex Ferguson.  He’s a freaking knight, for Christ’s sake!  You don’t just stroll in from across the pond, snatch a nation’s most beloved sports franchise, and then fire the knight who coaches them!  

Reports indicate that Ferguson’s job is safe, a relief to many.  Personally, I’d like to see Sir Alex challenge Glazer to a sword fight to determine the rightful master of United.  A knight’s got to do what a knight’s got to do, you know?  Ferguson would instantly be a hero to millions of Brits, and he’d probably get a royal pardon, too.

Maybe a better analogy would be something from college athletics, because the English devotion to soccer clubs is more like the love that many Americans give to their college programs, not the cynical support of American pro teams.  Imagine if, somehow, Oxford University had decided to buy the North Carolina basketball program, Dean Dome and all, right out from under UNC.  And by some freak happenstance way, there was nothing that UNC could do about it.  How do you think the Carolina fans would take that?  There’d be riots down on Franklin Street, no doubt.

I understand Glazer’s desire to own sports franchises.  Believe me, if I was filthy rich, I would buy the St. Louis Cardinals and the New Orleans Saints.  And I’d turn the Saints around, finally.  But this just sounds like a really terrible idea on Glazer’s part.  Did he wake up one day and think to himself “How can I become the most hated man in England?”  Because that’s where he’s going with this.  He’d better install some seriously strong protective measures around the owner’s box at Old Trafford, because it’s going to be an ugly scene the first time he shows his face there on match day.  Lest he forget, people have died at soccer games.  Lots of them.  And he’s going to be a marked man in Manchester. 

A word of advice, Malcolm.  Spend a ton of money.  Buy the best players.  Beat Chelsea at its own game.  Bring Beckham back.  Fans have a funny thing about winning.  Do that, and most other things can be overlooked.  When United starts hoisting Premiership trophies at Old Trafford again, fans may forget how much they hate your ugly American intrusion.